Lights
by SugarIsHEALTHY
Summary: If it were his choice, everything would be different. He'd still live with his family-minus his father, of course; it's partly his fault Nico's life is like it is-and his mother and sister would shine the way, be the lighthouse in the storm. But Nico di Angelo isn't normal, even by demigod standards.


**So, I LOVE the song Lights. So what else to do besides write about it? :D**

**This is technically a song-fic, but I didn't want to put the lyrics **_**in **_**the writing, so I put them **_**before**_** the writing. Clever, right? :D (Not really…)**

**(kind of) IMPORTANT MESSAGE AT THE BOTTOM!**

-:-

_Lights_

_I had a way, then, losing it all on my own_

_I had a heart then, but the queen has been overthrown_

_And I'm not sleeping now, the dark is too hard to beat_

_And I'm not keeping now, the strength I need to push me_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_And so I tell myself that I'll be strong_

_And dreaming when they're gone_

'_Cause they're calling, calling, calling me home_

_Calling, calling, calling_

_Home_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_Noises, I play within my head_

_Touch my own skin and hope that I'm still breathing_

_And I think back to when my brother and my sister slept,_

_In an unlocked place, the only time I feel safe_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_And so I tell myself that I'll be strong_

_And dreaming when they're gone_

'_Cause they're calling, calling, calling, me home_

_Calling, calling, calling_

_Home_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_Home_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_(Home, home)_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_Lights, lights_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_And so I tell myself that I'll be strong_

_And dreaming when they're gone_

'_Cause they're calling, calling, calling me home_

_Calling, calling, calling_

_Home_

_You show the lights that stop me, turn to stone_

_You shine it when I'm alone_

_Home_

_(Home, Home)_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_(Home, home)_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_Lights, lights, lights, lights_

_-Ellie Goulding_

-:-

A boy, no older than 13, stumbles out of a dark alley and into the streets. He wanders aimlessly, getting drenched by the pouring rain. But he doesn't seem to notice.

There are few other pedestrians out, even here, the city-that-never-sleeps, New York City. It seems like the darkness chased them all away, making them cower in their houses with their families.

Except, of course, for one person.

But Nico di Angelo is no ordinary boy, not even by demigod standards. Most half-bloods have 'parent' problems, but, being the son of Hades, Nico has the most.

He hardly remembers the good times, when his mother, his sister and him all lived happily together.

He had a heart then, and he might still have one, underneath all the blood and war. But even if it's there, there's no recovery, no good queen of hearts to take the throne.

All good creatures fear the dark, and for good reason, too.

It takes, it hurts, and it destroys.

It's his father.

They all say Hades is evil. The may be right, they may not be. Nobody knows. Not even Nico.

They think that as a son of Hades, _he _should be evil, too. But nobody knows if that's true. Not even Nico.

They think he should _love _darkness and solitude and loneliness and everything else a stereotypical child of death should like. Nico may _appear_ that way, but he sure as Hades doesn't enjoy it.

Truth is, he _hates _the dark and solitude and loneliness. But he endures it because it's _unheard _of to be otherwise.

Why should he like the dark? It just reminds him of how _alone _he is. Solitude and loneliness don't help him, either.

If it were his choice, everything would be different. He'd still live with his family, (minus his father, of course; it's partly his fault Nico's life is like it is) and his mother and sister would shine the way, be the lighthouse in the storm.

But it's not like that.

Because his family is _dead._

And even a son of Hades can't bring them back.

Sometimes, in the times when Nico is feeling the most depressed, he'll summon them. When he's all alone, he'll rip away the cover of darkness, exposing the brilliant light they shine for him, even in death.

But it doesn't last forever.

Death takes it's hold, as it always does, and submerges them, drowning them in the emptiness.

And Nico wishes he could go with them.

But he wishes in vain, because no matter how hard he tries, it proves impossible to commit suicide.

(Oh, the irony.)

(But he's not laughing.)

He knows Bianca and his mother would never forgive him if he completely gave up on life, so he pretends to be a strong (if emotionless) rock, holding his own against the harsh sea that is reality, crashing against him, burning his eyes with the bitterness.

(He thinks the water references have something to do with Percy being the only one alive who seemingly cares about him.)

When the beautiful lights are vanquished and his family gone, it doesn't feel real. So he determines that the only time he is actually awake is with them. The rest of the time is just a dream.

(More like a nightmare.)

They call to him. Bianca, his mother, they're calling him home.

Home.

Such a foreign concept, to any demigod, really.

But especially Nico.

All of his older half-siblings (who are dead and forgotten, if they were remembered in the first place) were said to be insane.

But Nico knows better.

If the rest of them went through what he did, yeah, they would talk to themselves, yeah, they wouldn't be positive they're actually alive.

Nico does is like that, too.

But he's _not_ insane.

(At least, that's what he tells himself.)

Bianca could comfort him; his mother could, too. Back when they were happy and naive, sleeping with the door unlocked.

But that was the only time Nico felt safe.

Now is different.

Now, well, now Nico wanders the street alone, (technically) thirteen years old, and (basically) homeless.

Because no matter how many times Percy may invite him to stay at his apartment, or Chiron tells him to come to camp, Nico's not an idiot.

He sees the look in their eye, how they're silently _pleading_ for him to decline.

And he does.

(Duh. What else would he do?)

Because Nico di Angelo will never be accepted.

And it sure as Hades doesn't look like it will ever change.

-:-

**IMPORTANT MESSAGE THAT YOU DON'T REALLY HAVE TO READ BUT I WOULD LIKE IF YOU DID :D**

**So, anyway, the thing about this 'story' is…**

**Pause for dramatic effect**

…**I don't really like it.**

**I just really wanted to do a Lights song-fic, matched it up with Nice, 'cause he fits pretty awesome-ly in it, and started writing.**

**And the problem with that is… Ok, I can't really name a specific thing, but there **_**are**_** problems.**

**And that, my fellow readers, is where you guys come in.**

**I'd **_**REALLY**___**appreciate it if you told me what I could improve on. I'll probably rewrite this sometime in the near (or distant…) future, and want to know how to make it better. So, PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE make suggestions *****puppy dog eyes***** (you know you can't resist them :D)**

**And thus I end this ridiculously long author's note :/**

**PEACE :D**


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